Mar. 8th, 2009

spaiku: (didn't you know)
"Every Advent we entered the purgatory of lutefisk, a repulsive gelatinous fishlike dish that tasted of soap and gave off an odor that would gag a goat. We did this in honor of Norwegian ancestors, much as if survivors of a famine might celebrate their deliverance by feasting on elm bark. I always felt the cold creeps as Advent approached, knowing that this dread delicacy would be put before me and I’d be told, "Just have a little." Eating a little was like vomiting a little, just as bad as a lot."

"Lutefisk is cod that has been dried in a lye solution. It looks like the desiccated cadavers of squirrels run over by trucks, but after it is soaked and reconstituted and the lye is washed out and it’s cooked, it looks more fish-related, though with lutefisk, the window of success is small. It can be tasty, but the statistics aren’t on your side. It is the hereditary delicacy of Swedes and Norwegians who serve it around the holidays, in memory of their ancestors, who ate it because they were poor. Most lutefisk is not edible by normal people. It is reminiscent of the afterbirth of a dog or the world’s largest chunk of phlegm."

"Lutefisk is not food, it is a weapon of mass destruction. It is currently the only exception for the man who ate everything. Otherwise, I am fairly liberal, I gladly eat worms and insects, but I draw the line on lutefisk."
"What is special with lutefisk?"
"Lutefisk is the Norwegians' attempt at conquering the world. When they discovered that Viking raids didn't give world supremacy, they invented a meal so terrifying, so cruel, that they could scare people to become one's subordinates. And if I'm not terribly wrong, you will be able to do it as well."
"But some people say that they like lutefisk. Do you think they tell the truth?"
"I do not know. Of all food, lutefisk is the only one that I don't take any stand on. I simply cannot decide whether it is nice or disgusting, if the taste is interesting or commonplace. The only thing I know, is that I like bacon, mustard and lefse. Lutefisk is an example of food that almost doesn't taste anything, but is so full of emotions that the taste buds get knocked out."

"Well, we tried the lutefisk trick and the raccoons went away, but now we've got a family of Norwegians living under our house!"

"O lutefisk, O lutefisk, how pungent your aroma / O lutefisk, O lutefisk, you put me in a coma
(A version specific to Washington State uses: "You smell just like Tacoma," a reference to the pulp mills that used to pollute the air around the city.)"

"When Lutefisk is Outlawed, Only Outlaws Will Have Lutefisk! A bumper sticker seen around Seattle in the 1980s, parodying the gun-rights slogan of the era"

"The negative view of lutefisk exemplified in these jokes may have led Ulf Gunnarsson to write his parody Lutefisk and Yams. This take-off starts out in trochaic hexameter: "Hark and ware oh warrior, weird of Sven now hear you". The initial section uses alliteration instead of rhyme, like much Old English heroic poetry (e.g., Beowulf): "Finally pounds of pancakes paired with lingonberries.". Then it switches to iambic tetrameter as it imitates Dr. Seuss: "I do not like lutefisk and yams/I do not like them Sven-I-Am"."

"The Wisconsin Employees' right to know law, in defining "toxic substances", specifically exempts Lutefisk (Wisc. Stat. 101.58(2)(j)(2)(f)[1])"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lutefisk
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rakfisk

oh, scandanavia.
spaiku: (didn't you know)
"Every Advent we entered the purgatory of lutefisk, a repulsive gelatinous fishlike dish that tasted of soap and gave off an odor that would gag a goat. We did this in honor of Norwegian ancestors, much as if survivors of a famine might celebrate their deliverance by feasting on elm bark. I always felt the cold creeps as Advent approached, knowing that this dread delicacy would be put before me and I’d be told, "Just have a little." Eating a little was like vomiting a little, just as bad as a lot."

"Lutefisk is cod that has been dried in a lye solution. It looks like the desiccated cadavers of squirrels run over by trucks, but after it is soaked and reconstituted and the lye is washed out and it’s cooked, it looks more fish-related, though with lutefisk, the window of success is small. It can be tasty, but the statistics aren’t on your side. It is the hereditary delicacy of Swedes and Norwegians who serve it around the holidays, in memory of their ancestors, who ate it because they were poor. Most lutefisk is not edible by normal people. It is reminiscent of the afterbirth of a dog or the world’s largest chunk of phlegm."

"Lutefisk is not food, it is a weapon of mass destruction. It is currently the only exception for the man who ate everything. Otherwise, I am fairly liberal, I gladly eat worms and insects, but I draw the line on lutefisk."
"What is special with lutefisk?"
"Lutefisk is the Norwegians' attempt at conquering the world. When they discovered that Viking raids didn't give world supremacy, they invented a meal so terrifying, so cruel, that they could scare people to become one's subordinates. And if I'm not terribly wrong, you will be able to do it as well."
"But some people say that they like lutefisk. Do you think they tell the truth?"
"I do not know. Of all food, lutefisk is the only one that I don't take any stand on. I simply cannot decide whether it is nice or disgusting, if the taste is interesting or commonplace. The only thing I know, is that I like bacon, mustard and lefse. Lutefisk is an example of food that almost doesn't taste anything, but is so full of emotions that the taste buds get knocked out."

"Well, we tried the lutefisk trick and the raccoons went away, but now we've got a family of Norwegians living under our house!"

"O lutefisk, O lutefisk, how pungent your aroma / O lutefisk, O lutefisk, you put me in a coma
(A version specific to Washington State uses: "You smell just like Tacoma," a reference to the pulp mills that used to pollute the air around the city.)"

"When Lutefisk is Outlawed, Only Outlaws Will Have Lutefisk! A bumper sticker seen around Seattle in the 1980s, parodying the gun-rights slogan of the era"

"The negative view of lutefisk exemplified in these jokes may have led Ulf Gunnarsson to write his parody Lutefisk and Yams. This take-off starts out in trochaic hexameter: "Hark and ware oh warrior, weird of Sven now hear you". The initial section uses alliteration instead of rhyme, like much Old English heroic poetry (e.g., Beowulf): "Finally pounds of pancakes paired with lingonberries.". Then it switches to iambic tetrameter as it imitates Dr. Seuss: "I do not like lutefisk and yams/I do not like them Sven-I-Am"."

"The Wisconsin Employees' right to know law, in defining "toxic substances", specifically exempts Lutefisk (Wisc. Stat. 101.58(2)(j)(2)(f)[1])"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lutefisk
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rakfisk

oh, scandanavia.

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